Low I.Q. on Vali's day
Since its Valentine’s Day, I guess I should get all of the romantic comedies out of the way. I.Q. 1994 Directed by Fred Schepisi (the same talent that brought you mediocre films with high profile casts, Russia House, Fierce Creatures, Roxanne, Mr. Baseball), a talented “mismanager” of talent. At least he’s in good company. What can I say, Walter Mathau as that-smart-old-guy-that-you-just-put-frizzy-white-hair-on-another-old-guy-it- automatically-becomes-that-smart-old-guy. I think his name is Einstein or something like that, brought a man back to life using lighting bolts or something to that effect. It’s sad when you get to the age where you can play Einstein, and that role annuls all the other great roles before it. Walter will be mostly remembered for Grumpy Old Men, and sadly, Dennis the Menace and sadder still, Grumpier Old Men, but there are entire libraries of great films that this generation will probably never care to pick up and ignore completely, that Walter Matthau did some beautiful works. To name a few, Hopscotch, Little Miss Marker (come on, I was a sentimental kid), Bad News Bears (nobody plays Buttermaker better, I like Billy Bob Thornton just fine, but nobody), The Taking of Pelham 1, 2, 3 (one of his best foul-mouth roles ever), actually there’s too many to name, but I have to mention King Creole, Elvis’s 4th movie, dark movie for the king and Matthau as crook/mentor played with amazing calm intensity, my favorite of The King’s movie BTW (digression – originally the lead role was intended for James Dean, but Elvis lobbied hard and won it in the end after Dean passed on it. On a sad note, this was the type of roles The King really wanted to do, something with a lot of weight, but ended up as a whore to the money making and exploitative machine of the Colonel Tom Parker, and ended up making fluff pieces to promote his music, a true Greek tragedy). Since is Vali’s day, let me be nice, I actually like I.Q. It’s been out since 1994, and amazingly, this is my first viewing, yes, I know, not that there hasn’t been an equal share of people urging me throughout the years to watch this movie, but it all just came down to the fact that I believe at the time that there are better movies for me to spend my time watching than Matthau playing Einstein and Meg Ryan play his equally smart niece (that right, that is comedy enough if you ask me). But to be fair, it not a bad movie, nothing fantastic and a bit over indulgent with lighting and composition with for what it is, your typical cookie-cutter romantic comedy, that at times seems to be quite impressed with itself than the audience. And for the love of god, can all of these actresses stop playing scientist, please, huh, please, before I loose it and take a rifle up to a clock tower to solve this problem. They are driving me crazy: Elizabeth Shue: The Saint, and Hollow Man (I guess she felt she didn’t say what she wanted with the idiot blond scientist role in the Saint so she had to reprise), Mira Sorvino: Mimic, Meg Ryan: I.Q., Helen Hunt: Twister, Kathleen Turner: Baby Geniuses, even though the list is endless, let’s just end on Baby Geniuses shall we. At the very least they should try to understand a tenth of what they are saying, or else how do you expect us to accept the fact that you understand what your character is saying? I rather pay to see Walter Matthau playing Einstein as the futuristic cyborg terminator sent back in time (programmed with an Austrian accent, which Einstein had – well, more of a Swiss, but Swiss, Austrian, German, the Nazis didn’t seem to know the difference) to kill the mother of the future leader of the human race, just as appropriately ridiculous as John Wayne playing Genghis Khan, wait he did play Genghis Khan, The Conqueror, I gracefully withdraw my ranting. Hollywood, you win again. Some great movies to watch for you romantics out there, Needing You (HK, 2000) and it’s companion piece A Moment of Romance (HK, 1990, don’t let the title fool you, it’s a sad ending) Chungking Express (HK, 1993), Love Undercover (HK, 2002), Love Letter (Japan, 1995), and where would love be without the French? Amelie, Hiroshima Mon Amor, The Lover, and the Americans, Sixteen Candles, Casablanca (if you’re alone, a little Boggy goes a long way), Say Anything and the Sure Thing, oh what the hell, make it a Cusack triple feature with Hi-Fidelity, Black Belt Jones (just seeing if you’re paying attention) Xanadu (I know, I know, give it a shot, you’re obviously dateless if you’re reading this, what do you have to lose, your millionth viewing of Lord of the Rings?) and Annie Hall, you need a little Woody on Vali’s day. Ones to stay away from, anything with Meg Ryan, yes, including I.Q. and Sleepless in Seattle, especially Sleepless in Seattle, Titanic (trust me), Bed of Roses (as sappy and crappy as they come – I wish I can articulate this better…umm…umm…no I can’t, it’s pretty crappy), Ghost (unless you have bucket near by, then by all means indulge), which reminds me, not that anyone would remember, Wisdom (if you generally like to watch bad movies with friends on Vali’s day or any other day, then this is your movie, Directed by one time boyfriend of Moore, Emilio Estevez, purely priceless) and Xanadu (for the same reason that I said you should watch it).
Labels: GO OUT, It's Valentine's Day, Stop Reading
